Before you read on, keep in mind that I have since abandoned a lot of the guidelines I created in this post. I was young, inexperienced and probably very hungry when I first started this blog so things have evolved a ton in terms of how I approach food and how I approach creating reviews. I keep this initial post here as a kind of memento of how I used to write and of how much I've grown. Writing for me has always been off the cuff, even more so when I was younger so its funny to go down memory lane and read some of my older posts. I only hope you can get a laugh from this stuff as well.
Yarharhar! This is the inaugural post to my food blog. The blog will be primarily made up of food reviews, personal recipes and general foodie adventures. It will let me document some of the delicious things I happen to come across during my life on earth. I only wish I started this sooner, as so many delicious delicacies have faded into memory.
But enough with the rambling, time for something worth reading. I mentioned restaurant reviews, but before I lay my subjective judgement onto poor unsuspecting restaurants I need to set some ground rules.
My reviews will be unstructured, I will not be using any set criteria other than prior experiences to judge the dishes I consume. As much as I want to be as consistent as possible for your sake (and mine) there will be times where I miss the mark. I may give overly favourable reviews because I just happen to be in a better mood on X day then on Y day. It happens, and should be taken into account when reading.
My review and subsequent rating will be primarily based on the food and the dish I ate. I may outline the decor, atmosphere and all around service at the restaurant in my review but that will in no way affect the mark. I am all about the food baby.
Finally I will explain the scale that I will use, this will be the only time I explain the scale because I feel like a singular in-depth explanation is better than me writing the scale over and over again in every post. From 1-10 the scale is as follows:
1 - Disgusting; never eat; avoid at all cost. Now I highly doubt I will ever give anyone or anything a one. For something to deserve this rating it would have to be basically inedible, which begs the question, why the hell am I trying it at all?
2 - Awful; who let this out of the kitchen? Not as bad as before, but not much better either. I would throw these dishes away after the first bite.
3 - Very bad; for lack of a better term. This is the land of the tasteless soup, of the burnt steaks, it was food once destined for greatness suddenly dropped into the depths of hell.
4 - Bad. The dish wasn't a complete train wreck but there were enough flaws that made it something I would like to not eat again.
5 - Mediocre. Now things start getting better, just making the cut, a passing grade, 50%, am I making my point?
6 - Decent. The dish in general is fine, it may have one or two problems but they are not enough to hold the dish down. It is here that dishes start to have good qualities to them as well.
7 - Good. The dish has been executed well, flaws are minor, and things are tasty enough here that I would definitely eat again.
8 - Excellent. The dish is very well done, it has multiple exemplary qualities to it or has little to no flaws.
9 - Amazing. You must eat this, the only thing that is setting this back from a ten is.. well look at the description for ten.
10 - Holy Shi- now here is the creme of the crop, tens are not only perfectly done but they will give you a new take on food that you will not be able to experience anywhere else. These dishes are either culinary master pieces or new takes on old classics.
I wanted to make this scale as realistic as possible, I wanted to avoid becoming the IGN of food (TENS EVERYWHERE), bear in mind the numbers may seem harsher than normal, but if you read the actual reviews you will realize that I will give 5-7s to places I actually enjoyed eating at.
So lets the culinary journey begin *bites pepper*
P.S. I still cannot believe the chairman ate a yellow pepper raw
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